How To Live Your Life By Design

In June 2022, I was 99% of the way to burnt out in my junior executive role.

I was a Jr. VP at 27, making sales, building a personal brand, and getting tons of engagement on LinkedIn, but deep down I was struggling to find my identity- searching deep inside myself for what really mattered.

My mentor helped me realize I wasn't focusing enough on my mental health. So what'd I do?

I redesigned my life to keep from burning out.

Here are the 7 things I did- that I hope could help you from burning out too.

Set email rules:

For the first 5 years of my career, I responded to emails at 4:30 am every morning while eating my breakfast. 100 mph to start the day.

When I’d get home from work, I’d check every email that came in after 5:00 pm. Sometimes I’d respond to those too. 100 mph to end the day.

No wonder I was burning out.

Now, I have 2 rules for email I rarely break:

1. AM: No email until I get into work

2. PM: No email after I leave work

Guardrails.

The results?

Less stress and more present while home. Win-win.

Ask yourself: What rule can you create around email?

Set work rules:

Early in my career, I stayed late most nights. Everything felt like an emergency that couldn’t wait until tomorrow.

So I set another rule for myself:

"I will not miss dinner with my wife."

It was hard at first, but that rule gave me the courage to build a habit of leaving at 4 pm. And I finally started recognizing what was really an emergency.

To be clear, sometimes I break this rule because something urgent comes up. Sometimes I need to break it for a week at a time depending on the problem. But the point of setting the rule is to make staying late an exception not the norm.

Ask yourself: What rule can you create around work?

Set “no phone” time:

Every day, there are 3 times I try not to look at my phone at all:

1. From waking up until I get to work

2. When I walk the dog 

3. Once I get into bed

Having a guaranteed ~3 hours without looking at my phone is so important in today's society.

Ask yourself: When could I schedule "no phone" time?

Prioritize “family” time:

“Family” time to me means being present with my wife, friends, parents, etc.

I try not to check my phone, I try not to think about work.

Just be present with my family.

If you do one thing off this list, I’d urge you to pick this one. Being present with the most important people in your life on a daily basis is the greatest joy you can have.

Ask yourself: Am I present with my family on a daily basis?

Take "productive" breaks during the workday:

I’m big into yoga.

So, almost daily, I take about 10 minutes to stretch in my office.

I know stretching is not for everyone, but the point is you need to find a productive way to take a break during the workday. 

It will be good for your mental health, and you'll be able to focus 10x better.

Ask yourself: What productive break could I take during the workday?

Take walks after work:

This may be my favorite mental health tool right now.

I used to HATE taking walks.

Now I’m addicted to them.

“If you are in a bad mood go for a walk. If you are still in a bad mood, go for another walk.”

– Hippocrates

Ask yourself: Can I make 10 minutes to walk after work?

Practice meditation:

I talked about this on a recent TBCE newsletter.

Meditation is a beautiful way to reduce stress. 10 minutes a day can open up a space in your life you can go to at any time.

“Some people live as though they are already dead. There are people moving around us who are consumed by their past, terrified of their future, and stuck in their anger and jealousy. They are not alive; they are just walking corpses.”

―Thich Nhat Hanh, Vietnamese Monk

 Ask yourself: Can I wake up 10 minutes earlier to meditate daily?

And that’s it.

In my journey, I've learned a lot by hearing what other people do for their mental health. So I hope my story helps you in a similar way.

I love this stuff and really want to see more construction professionals focusing on their mental health in 2023.

So don't forget: Call your parents, hug your significant other, show yourself some love, and have a great Saturday.

Your friend,

Matt Verderamo